Missing Pieces Table of Contents

Introduction

The Brain: An Organ for Faith

Before we came to know brain injury, most of us probably took our brains pretty much for granted. But it determines the person and when a brain injury occurs, that person is forever changed.

Shattered Dreams

We were the quintessential “normal” family. But Dale was a warm intelligent, articulate man who was sent off to surgery and came back childlike, irrational and confused. Our life would never be the same again.

First Fears

This can not be happening to us! (Includes exercises to help you focus on what’s real and what’s not.)

The Power of Anger

Anger is a powerful change agent. It can help you begin to mobilize your resources and fight for your family.

Getting Through Grief

There is no adequate way to describe the force of grief. It becomes an overwhelming, dominating force in your life. Understanding it will help you cope with the ups and downs of living with brain injury.

Guilt

Brain injury in the family will make guilt a constant companion; a disagreeable, hateful, unwelcome companion. (Includes exercises to help you deal with guilt that stems from the brain injury or your response to it.)

Anger

Anger can be useful or harmful. Controlling your rage about the situation will help you be more assertive and give you the strength to continue with the battle. (Includes helpful exercises to focus your thoughts on what you can do to use and then free yourself from anger.)

Depression

You can hold depression at bay for a while with the things you absolutely MUST do, but sooner or later you will have to reorganize your life so that you are replacing some of the “must do’s” with things you WANT to do. (Includes exercises to help you recognize the danger signs of depression.)

Acceptance

Accepting the enormity of the tragedy that has happened to your family is harder than most people think. It means taking your life off hold and getting on with it.

Self Care

You must make time for yourself even though it seems impossible. Perspective, People and Pleasure will keep you from burning out.

When Families Falter

Families can fall apart and/or become dysfunctional after brain injury. There are signs to watch for that will help you head off problems.

Taking Control

One day you turn the corner and life seems under control again.

Work the System

The health care system you will have to deal with is sometimes a confusing maze. Information is the key to dealing with it successfully.

Detaching

It seems impossible that you can find the space to step back from the emotions and the demands of your new life, but it is necessary for you to enjoy life again.

Special Problems

Spouses and children and parents all approach the tragedy of a brain injury in the family from a different set of emotions and experience. Sexual realities, loss of identity and roles need to be recognized and dealt with.

Jigsaw Puzzle

On the other side of the struggle lies a certain peace and understanding about yourself and your life. It is a long and difficult journey, but life is all about living.

Dale’s Story

An interview with Dale Maxwell, whose brain injury is at the center of this book. He tells a family friend about his losses and his triumphs, as well as his hopes for the future.

A Final Word from the Author

Note

Resources

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